Kaitlyn's Kapers: Joy in the Little Things

The past two weeks have blown me away. I have begun to pick up on more conversations going on around me, ran in the rain, seen a different side of Belgium's beauty, danced in the rain, kayaked down a river, saw a castle, realized how proud I am to be an American, and fallen in love with everyone and everything.

The language is getting easier, but it is still a major struggle. I'm able to pick up on a lot more conversations and it catches my Belgian friends off guard when I comment on something that they thought I couldn't understand. It gives me hope when I see the shock on their face after they realize that I've understood something. :) My friends at school are incredible. I've never met people who are so patient and willing to help somebody who's basically illiterate. There are days where I'll be working on my packet of French and they'll sit down, watch me, and correct me when I mess up (which happens a lot). I'm beginning to understand the past, present, and future participles and I can even put it to use with a couple of words! It's frustrating to still not understand everything, but I'm realizing more and more that everything comes with time. Y'all know I'm not a patient person, but I've definitely learned how to be more patient with myself since I've been here. At first, I would get extremely frustrated with myself for not understanding something that my friends were asking me, but then I realized that getting frustrated with myself doesn't help me, it actually hurts me. I still miss a ton in school, and I don't realize little things like having homework or a test the next day, but I can't expect myself to be able to carry the same weight as the people who have been studying the language for 17+ years. That's not possible. So when somebody asks if I completed the homework or passed the test and I say, "no" and get a look of disapproval, I have to be gracious with myself because it's not possible. I physically and mentally can't carry the same weight as the students here. While I am trying my hardest to understand and learn with the students here, my main focus is learning the language and building relationships - not passing the history test. So regardless of what the people around me expect, all I can do is my best.

Rotary organizes trips once a month on Wednesdays (since we have half days on Wednesdays) and the last one was to a place called Blegny Mine. They split up by countries (so we could understand) but they split America up in two groups - one in French, and one in English. I went on the one in French and was ridiculously happy when I could understand what was being said. :)

We watched a documentary on 9/11 in school the other day and it amazed me how much it affected me and made me proud to be an American. I found myself near tears at certain points, angry at some points, and so ridiculously proud of the way we handled ourselves in that disaster. I found myself thinking about how they think they understand America, but they don't understand what it was like to remember that day and how every family sat in front of the TV all night and cried. Or to hear the staggering death tolls. Or what it is still like every year on social medias and with all the memorials. Even in a little town in Texas, it's still a big deal 13 years later... It made me so thankful for every fireman, police officer, doctor, nurse, civilian, and anybody else that helps protect and make our country what it is (especially you daddy). I've never been so proud to be an American.

Rotex are a group of rebound exchange students - meaning that they are natives who have gone on exchange in a different country and have come back and continued to stay involved in Rotary (I want to do this when I get back to Texas). Yesterday I was blessed with the opportunity to go kayaking with Rotex. We paddled 20km (the equivalent of 12 miles), danced in a green field, and saw a castle. The first half I was slightly agitated because I hadn't had sleep in 3+ days and was absolutely exhausted, but then My and I (a friend from Florida) got stuck on a rock it completely changed my view on what not only the day was about, but also what Rotary was about. By that time, My and I had become a good team and were able to maneuver around almost any obstical... that we could see.. :P Well, we didn't see one rock, and once we were on it there was no getting off of it! One of the Rotex and exchange student passed us, laughed, and turned around to help us. I was completely helpless with getting us off because I'd hit the delirium stage of exhaustion where all you can do is laugh. It was one of those moments where you had two choices - 1. get really mad. or 2. laugh and enjoy the (literal) bump in the road. I chose the second. After I'd almost fallen in the water from laughing so hard, I found myself enjoying everything so much more! I saw the leaves changing colors, heard the birds singing, and felt the joy from the water splashing on me. Everything completely changed, and I loved it. Being able to see some friends that I don't normally get to see was so refreshing, and it made me realize just how much I love and adore these people from every corner of the world.

As I find myself more comfortable here, falling in love with it, and understanding more, I also find myself missing little things like the trucks, the sweet tea, and the dirt road, but the thing I miss most are the people. And while I love this place and the people here, my heart is dividing more everyday and I find myself calling two places "home." That gives me hope. There is something so much bigger for this year, and I'm just barely beginning to understand it. I've experienced the division in my heart with Mexico, and that was just for two weeks, so I can only imagine how hard it will be to leave. I'm falling in love with this place and everyday I learn more about myself than I've ever known before. If somebody asked me who I thought I'd be after one month on exchange, this is not what I would have said. But the longer that I'm here, the more I learn that life is unexpected and things happen in time. I love that I've grown to adore this place more than I ever could've imagined and I can't wait to see what happens in the next month. :)