This Feels Like Home!

I am... absolutely in awe of God.

Today I went to a church with some family friends and I wish that I could put into words what it was like... I don't think I have ever felt so at home somewhere. When Franca told me I was going, I questioned how it would go and got slightly nervous... but as I prayed about it, I was completely at peace. Christ church expands all over the world, and love knows no borders. So as I got ready this morning, all I felt was excitement and peace. Had I known what I would have experienced today, I wouldn't have been able to be as calm as I was all morning.

The family picked me up and were so welcoming, I felt like I'd known them my whole life... even though I'd just met them. They talked to me in English, and I replied in french. Which was extremely helpful! Walking through the doors of that church... it was home. I wish that words could explain it... but I honestly don't think there are words that could explain it. I was instantly welcomed and met a girl from Australia who came to Belgium to nanny for a family. Kids were running around laughing and dancing and praising Jesus. There were literally words of praise coming out of their mouth. "Hallelujah!" everywhere! Pure happiness. No words.

We started off with worship and it reminded me so much of my mission trips to Mexico... People were literally at the front DANCING and singing at the top of their lungs! I was completely blown away! Thankfully they had lyrics to the songs so I was able to sing along... even though I didn't know how to pronounce the words correctly. These people that I already considered family were praising Jesus in a way that I've only seen a few times.... Love knows no borders. The pastors sons wife was an English teacher, so she translated the whole thing for me and Jessica (the Australian girl). But as we listened to the lesson, I found myself zoning into what he was saying and not so much what was being said in English... and what amazed me was that I understood! Most of it. I would listen to what he said and translate it in my head and next thing I know she was translating the same thing. You could say that I was excited to know that I was getting somewhere with the language, but that would be an understatement! 

For those of you that don't know yet, I found out on my way to Belgium that I have a stress fracture in my left ankle. Meaning that I have a crack in my bone. My doctor told me I was supposed to get a cane and boot to take the pressure of for the next six weeks, but since I'm already going into school with the biggest disadvantage of all, a language barrier, I decided that I'm going to wait to follow his instructions until I get home. Being as this fracture started two years ago, and doesn't really bother me that much, I figure I can make it to three years with it. 

Call me crazy... Idk how to explain this in words without sounding crazy... But they did the thing in Mexico the first time that really freaked me out and they prayed for fire (both in Mexico and here) and placed their hand on the persons head and they fell down... Today the people that needed physical healing went up and so I did and like... Ah no words... While he was praying over the person next to me, I was crying and praying in English (since I can't speak French and I don't have the gift of tongues even though they were talking in tongues) and he got to me and peace.... Just peace. My body went so still... I've never experienced something like that. Idk how to explain it... Just pure... There's no word! Just peace. 

My ankle hasn't hurt since I left. God is so good!

That was the most at home I've felt since I arrived here. It's unexplainable... Like, if nothing else, God brought me here so I could experience His home in a different country. I felt more at home here than I did in Mexico... And that's saying a lot

No words. Like... All day. No words. They're more family than a lot of my blood family. And I've only met them once. But I felt like I belonged. Like I had come home from a long trip. 

It's just crazy. Like I would never believe it if it wasn't me... That's why I didn't put it in the blog at first. But then again is that me not believing it? That's why I decided to go ahead and write about it. God is seriously so good. I just... Still... No words. 

Today was a time of revival and hope... And the fact that I could feel so at home, so quickly, blew me away. God is so faithful... and I can't wait to see where this journey takes me. :)

Acts 18:9-10 - Do Not Be Silent!

Whale... I'm not exactly sure where to begin. Over the past few days, I have seen a new face of Belgium, exchange students, and myself. I'm learning things I never would've thought possible, and finding things out about myself that I had no clue existed before. God is good and He speaks through the chaos.

 Disclosure: This blog is not meant to be offensive to anyone. It is meant to be a way to communicate with people what my exchange looks like, what I experience, and also serve as a sort of diary for myself. So, if you get offended by something I write, I'm sorry. However, I'm not going to sugar coat anything... I’m going to be completely transparent.
P.S. yes this blog does get better the farther you read.

 

Wednesday: There's a place in Liege where all the exchange students meet on Wednesdays (half days once school starts) and hang out and chill at the bars. Chelsea and I went this Wednesday and to be brutally honest, I was shocked. Yes, I went to high school and I get that people break rules and do all the stuff adults say we shouldn't do. Yes, the drugs, alcohol, and sex are happening where I'm from. But after experiencing the Carre, I understand why Europeans hate Americans... and exchange students. No, I didn't do anything. No, I didn't break the rules. No, I shouldn't feel dirty after leaving the Carre... but I did. I got home and felt broken and lost. The way that I imagine they felt when they got home... the difference was that I felt hope and peace in the midst of that brokenness. I was given purpose in that brokenness. Truth in the dirtiness. As I started to pray against the filth, brokenness, and hopelessness, I felt God whisper. He led me to Acts 18:9-10, "Don't be afraid! Speak out! Don't be SILENT! For I am with you, you will not be attacked or harmed, for many people in this city belong to me." I was ashamed that I had sat in silence as sin whirled around me, as people tried to find themselves in earthly things, and as hopelessness took over. God deserves better than that in a disciple. Would Paul have just sat by and watched? Yes, I need to live by my actions. But sometimes there's a time to speak up....

 

Thursday: Over 200 exchange students and sponsors went to Brussels to go see Parliament. I was blown away at all the history. We didn't really get to hear much about it, since there's so many of us it's next to impossible to do a tour where we learn a lot about a place, but the architecture was unlike anything in the US. It's so classy! For lunch we tried the special Meatballs and Fries that everyone says is a Belgian thing. We also got to sit in our first official, country wide, meeting. As is normal here, America was the biggest... and the loudest.

 I was so relieved, and also nervous after the Carre, about meeting exchange students. I prayed the whole way to the train station, and the majority of the way there just asking for guidance. I met over a hundred people, and connected with ten. But those ten that I met, were so refreshing to be around.

I was still shocked at the way we represented our countries, no it was not just America. Rotary's number one rule and goal is ADAPT. We were not adapting. I understand that we all had our blazers on with tons of pins on each jacket, and I believe in being proud of your country and where you represent, but it was taken too far. We did not blend in to the area around us as 300+ people marched past hundreds of tourists and Belgians and scream and shouted, "USA! USA! USA!" over. and over. and over again. It was never ending. It ranged from singing our national anthem, to saying the pledge countless times. I've never seen Americans have this much spirit in the States, so it was slightly confusing as to why it just popped up all of the sudden! However, there is also something exhilarating about a hundred people singing the national anthem and yelling, "USA! USA! USA!" afterwards... so many mixed feelings about that!

A few of my Texas friends :)

Texas in front of the Palace!

This was our view leading into the city on our way to lunch

AMERICA

And of course everybody had to join in at the last second!

This is where we marched down the street. 200 students chanting, "USA! USA! USA!"

One of the beautiful Church's we passed

The Town Square

One of the side streets of the town square

The Palace that we toured

Two new friends. :)

Franssss

My view during the meeting

Friends at lunch!

By the end of lunch, I had found a group of people that I honestly enjoyed being around. We were able to encourage each other with difficulties we were having and talk about the most random things! I met somebody who had seen me in the airport, somebody who liked the rain (not common among people here), somebody who was going to my school, and so many other interesting and awesome people! Not to mention my oldie is pretty awesome. :)

Since the first week of my exchange was spent at the Delia's house, I was socially out of whack... and of course it didn't help that I'm already awkward in the first place! But I absolutely loved getting to meet so many people who were experiencing something like I was. It's refreshing to know that I'm not alone in this adventure, and that I can find comfort around them. This is the opportunity of a lifetime, and I can't wait to see where else this takes me!

I rode back on the bus with a friend I'd made from Texas, and it was so nice to talk about sweet tea and Chipotle! The tea here is carbonated and I'm so glad they have tea, but it's not like McAlister's tea! :) The countryside reminded me a lot of Texas cuz it was mostly flat... but it was green, not brown. :P

After we got back, I saw Rene (my second host dad) and I was so happy to see a familiar face that I know and trust! My host parents came to pick me up and I didn't realize how much I had missed them until Franca started talking to me. I really have grown attached to my host family... and I don't think I could've asked for a better first family. The thing that surprised me most was that I had missed talking in French. What!? The whole trip, the exchange students had talked in English... and that was so nice cuz I could be positive that I understood what was going on! But when my host family started talking to me, I had renewed desire to talk to them and try to understand French. I was so excited when I could understand everything we talked about on the way to my third host families house for dinner! The fact that I was so happy to be with them again, gave me hope... I have an emotional connection here. Which means that if I was to leave now, I would miss Belgium. It's becoming my home and I'm falling in love with it. I love that!

We went to Franca's sisters house (my third host family) for dinner and I was so relieved to see Fiona and Vincent! I was able to talk in simple sentences and Franglish and we talked about school a lot. I think Vincent and Fiona will be in my classes, which makes me feel so much better about school! As we talked about school, it made me think a lot about my first day at Monterey... I was absolutely terrified. But after two years, I had made friends that I honestly believe will last a lifetime. I'm praying that God shows me friends here that I can trust and feel safe and loved around, and that I will fall in love with Belgium even more because of it. I'm nervous about not knowing enough of the language, but people are covering that in prayer  back in Texas so I'm not even worried about it as much as I could be. I found myself thinking about how happy I was to be around my family, and to be back to speaking French, and I knew that God had me here for a reason. It was reassurance of things unseen, hope for what is to come, and happiness in the moment. It was refreshing.

The longer we stayed at Fiona's house, the more I started to doubt myself. I was so unbelievably happy to be there during dinner and even for a bit after, but the sleep deprivation and exhaustion overcame me and I had trouble being as happy to be there. That is the closest thing to comfort that I have here, and after being pushed out of my comfort zone so much during Rotary, I really just wanted to talk to people back home and get a hug from a familiar person. I wanted to get in my car and go get sweet tea from McAlister's, and I wanted to drive on dirt roads with the windows rolled down and music blaring to clear my mind. But I can't do that now. I found myself thinking so much of what used to be that I could think of what was and is now. By doing so, I made it harder on me. We left Fiona's at 11 and I was beyond exhausted. I had done well with talking and understanding until the last 30 minutes, but I almost fell asleep on their couch when they were Skyping Livia. We went straight to bed when we got home and I was so frustrated with my phone because I couldn't get the Internet to work in my room... I was so exhausted and desperate to talk to someone familiar that I overwhelmed myself and couldn't think straight. And as always, Christ spoke through the panic and the frustration... "Make me your comfort. I am all you need..." yes, I wanted to talk to someone familiar that I loved and trusted at home, but Jesus was literally in the room with me, and I wasn't content with that. Talk about convicting. After I had come to the realization that I was finding comfort and seeking the wrong thing, I battled through so many emotions. How is it possible to have so many emotions in just a few minutes? Conviction, guilt, hopelessness, happiness, joy, reassurance, grace, overwhelming despair, frustration, and a feeling of "dang flabbit, Jesus. That's not the answer I wanted." It's funny how the answer we want isn't the one we need.... That's something I'm learning more here than ever have before... but there's also beauty in the disappointment I feel when it's not the answer I want. Nothing will shake you to your core like seeing your heart in the mess that it truly is and your human instincts shining through what you hoped was true.

Overall, I have to say that yesterday was one of my favorite days so far. It sucks being pushed out of your comfort zone and being ripped from what is familiar, but there's something so indescribably beautiful about what Christ whispers through it. He hears our prayers and bends down to listen... He is faithful.

Go be bold, fam.

Until next time,
KP

Roots and Adventure

Over the past three days I have:

• Made a friend
• Spent the night in my second host families house (foreign to me)
• Explored the Plaza in Liege with another exchange student (no host families)
• Rode a bus with Chelsea (no host families)
• Tried tons of food (and found a Pizza Hut)
• Went to Walibi (the Belgian version of Six Flags)
• Went to a aqua park
• Taught my second host dad how to Two-Step

The past three days have been completely different than anything I've ever experienced before. There's another exchanged student here from Idaho, and we're sharing host families (we're switching) so we've been talking all summer.

Chelsea came to the Delia's on Friday (my first host family, her second) and we talked for hours, explored a little bit of Liege, ate the best dinner yet (almost like chicken strips... aka home), and played a card game. After we finished the card game, I got my stuff and went to the VanderVeldes (my second host family, her first) to spend the night... Do you notice the switch in our families?

As you know, I've had a little bit of homesickness... of course, for my friends and family, but especially for physical touch and comfort. You never realize how important a hug, or a pat on the back is until you don't get it everyday. Belgians do this thing called "bisous" which is a kiss on the cheak, typically the right but it varies sometimes, and you do it with everybody. I've actually found that I like bisous better than a handshake because it's more personal, but it does not replace a hug. Since they do bisous and not hugs, my heart aches for a hug constantly.

The first thing Chelsea and I did after officially meeting in person was hug. Side note: In life of an exchange student, you have to become good friends with people you've never met. Partially because you have to, and partially because it's exhilirating and awesome. That fact is such a God thing right now....

At the beginning of the summer, I realized that it's not the place that makes it "home," but the people. Home is where the heart is, and the heart is with those we love. By the end of the summer, I had learned a whole new side of that. And now, I've learned even more. Those we surround ourselves with make more of an impact than we realize... a friend that you walk with everyday from class to class, a friend you call for lunch, a friend to watch the sunset with, a friend to drive around town with you when you're craving a certain type of chocolate and no place has it, a friend to drive an hour away for ice cream just because, a friend to spend the night with 9 nights in a row, a friend to bring you coffee at the airport, a friend to hug you and tell you they love you, a friend to encourage you when you're discouraged. Those are the things that I consider "home." And being away from that, from the comfort, the encouragement, the memories, is hard. But what has made the past three days so amazing, was making memories. Yes, I just met this girl. Yes, we've had 36 hours of face to face conversation - total. Yes, that's not typical. But it makes Belgium a little more "home" and a little less "foreign" and that makes all the difference in the world.

A hug. A conversation. A smile. A movie refrence. It's the little things, y'all. It's my host mom making fun of the way I draw out my "A" when I say, "y'all," and the way my host brother sings along to the TV, and the way my host dad quizes me on kitchen utensils. Little things like that make Belgium a little more homie and a little less foreign.

Chelsea and I went on an exploration... by ourselves! We rode the bus to the Plaza in Liege and explored for hours... we found a Pizza Hut, and of course we had to check it out cuz we both missed home (it's better at home). We tried Ice Cream, Waffles, Frozen Yogurt, and Tart de Fraise (strawberries). When we bought the Tart, they didn't have forks to eat it so we had to go on a hunt for one... we ended up at a resteraunt called Quick which is a fast food chain here. Once we had our fork, we ended up sitting under a tree in this neat little stone bench area. 10 minutes later, a performance group showed up. It was SO COOL! They were singing and dancing for a good 30 minutes... the passion they had blew me away and it made my heart so happy to see it. :) They all wore bright colors (not common in Belgium) with quirky patterns and add ons... one woman had toilet paper attached to her pants! Afterwards we went to H&M and I bought my first pair of black jeggings (because I don't like jeans and that's all they wear here).

Pascal  picked us up and we went school supply shopping... as I mentioned in a previous blog, the baskets are different here.You put a Euro in when you're using it and it unlocks it from another basket, but when you return the basket and plug the lock in, it spits your Euro back out. While we were at the market I found La Belle et la Bete (Beauty and the Beast), so of course I had to get it cuz it's my favorite!

Sunday I went to an ammusement park in Belgium... Walibi. It was so much fun riding the roller coasters with my family and getting to see their silly side. However, I have to say that Texas roller coasters have more thrill to them. The ones here are good, but there's not much roll to their coaster. I got the chance to "command" (as Vincent said) the order during lunch, and luckily didn't mess up too bad! I'm working on my accent.... but I think the Delia's were impressed that I stepped out and ordered instead of standing by quietly and observing like normal. We also went to Aqualibi (a water park) and they have Rapido (rapids) but they were so rough. In Texas, you typically have to wait a certain amount of time before you can go on a ride like that, but here they send clumps of people through at a time... So it gets a little bit crazy. But overall, it was a fantastic day. :)

I'm finding it easier to live. Easier to love. And easier to laugh. I still find myself thinking of home and wondering what my family and friends are doing, but I'm also content here. I'm able to see myself here and I feel like just a little part of myself belongs here now. Things aren't as awkward with my family, we're getting more comfortable around each other, our personalities are coming out, and I have memories which means that I would miss this place if I was to leave now. Which is a good thing. I'm becoming more comfortable and bold with my French, and I'm willing to actually attempt talking. My french is bad, and my accent needs work, but I'm slowly, oh so slowly, getting the hang of it. I'm falling in love with Belgium... with the people... with the culture. Slowly but surely.

God is faithful. God is good. God is BOLD.

until next time - tout-a-l'heure

KP

Prayer Works.

"Let all that I am Praise The Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise His holy name. Let all that I am Praise The Lord; may I never forget the good things He does for me."

Psalm 103:1-2



After posting my last blog on homesickness, God revealed how faithful He is. I received so much encouragement through text, email, and Facebook, that I was literally blown away. Knowing that people are following my blog and praying for me is the most encouraging thing and I couldn't ask for more. After spending time on my knees in prayer, as well as all the prayers from home, God revealed a hope that I hadn't seen before. One that said, "Do you see? I am faithful."

After a sleepless night (an hour and a half) from jet lag and restlessness, we woke up at 3:30 to take Livia to the airport. Having just come from Texas, I knew how hard it was to leave your family and walk through those gates. Seeing Livia cry brought back memories of my departure and I ended up crying along with a girl that I barely knew, yet had some kind of unexplainable connection with.

After we traveled the hour back from Brussels to Liege, I couldn't sleep (shocker). Thankful for the 7 hour difference, I was able to Skype with my bestfriend and hear what had been going on at home since I'd left. Hearing a voice that I knew and loved made all the difference in the world. I ended up taking a two hour nap, out of pure exhaustion and adrenaline, and woke up around 14h (2:00). Franca asked if I wanted to go explore Liege so I jumped out of bed and got ready to see a city that I still had yet to explore. I was able to see more of the culture and hear conversations going on around me. The more we explored, the more I fell in love with this beautiful city.

After we got home from the square, I asked Franca if I could go run through the block (since you can't really go around). Stepping out of the house without them was one of the most exhilarating, terrifying, exciting things I've done. Not to mention it felt amazing to allow my legs to move again! Not many people would go running in a foreign country, but I felt like a new person afterwards. I never realized how much I loved, and missed, running and squats!

Because I am able to identify certain areas when we go out, pick up pieces of conversations, and step out just a little bit, I am feeling more at home here. Just from the last day, I can tell the difference and I know how hard it will be to leave. A friend asked me, "if you could leave, would you?" No. As hard as it is to be somewhere where everything is unknown, I wouldn't change a second of it. The longer I'm here, the more I love it. I wish that I was able to parle (speak) back when they ask me questions or inquire about something, but I don't know enough of the language to form anything but extremely simple sentences. Prayers for that would be greatly appreciated, and continued prayer on adaptation and comprehension!

So thank you. Your prayers and encouragement has made all the difference in the world and literally turned my sadness into praise. God is faithful, y'all. And He is oh so good!



This is the City Hall of Liege (in the City Square)

The city bus



One of the streets :)

It rains all the time, so of course I had to take a picture if it!



This is inside of the Cathedral that Franca goes to

My family doesn't like the rain, so we ran through it to get back to the car and hid under a lean-to. It was, by far, one of my favorite moments in Belgium. :)

This is the outside of the Cathedral that Franca attends

My view on my run

Le supermarché :)

I got so excited when Livia told me they were going to to the supermarket, so I asked if I could tag along. I'm pretty sure that's the most excited I've been about something since I've gotten here. I mean, who doesn't love to see different foods!? 

When we got there, Livia wanted to print off some pictures to take to Dallas with her 

I didn't get a picture of it, but the have 6 buggys that are connected by a lock and you have to pay money to get a buggy. Franca, Salvador, and I went on to start shopping while Livia waited for her pictures. Franca started dragging a basket behind her, which I thought was very unique, being as I've never seen such a thing before. 

Salvatore asked me about le tart (a cake/pie) and eventually we found our way to the back of the store. 

I asked about Orangina, a drink I had tried in France, so they bought a few bottles. 

The view from the store was amazing, and I later found out that this was a "Turkish street" and that's why they didn't know how to drive. 

Later, I helped Franca, my host mom, cook banana and chocolate cake (which is a big step cuz I burn microwaveable macaroni)

This is the sunset from my room... God is good. 

Am I on a Roller Coaster?

I experienced my first bit of homesickness today... It's Livia's last day in Belgium before her exchange in Dallas, so all of her family has stopped by to say "au revoir." The festivities lasted over three hours and at one point there were over 25 people in the Delia's living room... which is a lot. Having 25 people in a room, speaking a language you can barely understand, that are all watching you, is rough. I got overwhelmed halfway through and had to step out of the room so that I wouldn't loose it in front of a bunch of people I barely knew. I began thinking of all the "see ya laters" I had to say and I got so discouraged. Those same questions that have burdened me for months popped up... Why did God call me to this? Why did He choose me? Why does it hurt so much when I thought it would hurt so little? I overwhelmed myself... I went upstairs to go to the restroom and lost it halfway up the stairs. After crying for three minutes, I pulled myself together and went back down for another two hours of confusion.  I feel like my mindset is in the right place and I'm able to focus when I need to focus, but my heart is struggling-and I'm ignoring it. I've been having my quiet time every morning when the sunrises and I think it's the only thing keeping me going right now. We all have days where we feel discouraged and downcast, and today has just been one of those days. But I am well aware of how unbelievably blessed I am to be here and experience something so amazing. I feel so humble and thankful for this opportunity, and no matter what I am feeling or experiencing, I wouldn't change a second of it. Yes, seeing all those people that had seen Livia grow up and depart from was painful. Yes, I miss my friends and family more than words could ever express. And yes, my heart is still in Texas. But no, I would not change the path I am on for an easier one. No, I would not go to college instead of Rotary. No, I would not rather be living my crazy busy life in Lubbock, Texas. And no, I will not let my downcast heart get the better of me. This is the truth I am speaking into my heart: I was called to this for a reason. No it's not easy, but I CAN (and I will) handle this the best way I know how. When my heart is overwhelmed, I will find refuge in Christ alone. For He is my rock and my salvation. He has enabled me to be a conqueror. An overcomer. And He has called me to something greater than I could ever ask or imagine... so I will live in that truth. No matter where life takes me, He is bigger.

Psalm 77:13, 19-20 says:
"O God your ways are holy. Is there any God as mighty as You? You are the God of Great Wonders!.. Your road lead through the sea, your pathway through the mighty waters - a pathway no one knew was there! You led your people along that road like a flock of sheep, with Moses and Aaron as their shepherds."

He has called me where my trust is without boarders, and I have said, "Lord, I am coming."

Day 2 & 3

Even though it's only been three days since I arrived, I can feel my english struggling more than ever before. Pour example: A friend asked what the rain was like and I meant to say, "it's cold and rainy which makes me happy." But instead, I said, "c'est cold and wainy which makes mi happy." It's little occurances like that which give me an idea of how far I've come in just three days.... Today I learned words like avec (along with), fourche (fork), demain (tomorrow), apres (after), and a lot more. I'm able to understand more, but still not very well. I've made multiple mistakes by saying, "oui" when I should have said, "non, merci." But my host family has been very gracious towards my unententional errors.

We tend to have a more relaxed lifestyle here than we do in The States. I've watched TV more here in the past few days than I have in years combined. The TV is almost always on. I haven't been in my room much, simply because I want to spend time with the Delia's and observe the differences.

Livia and I went bowling tonight with some of her friends so that she could say au revoir (goodbye) and I won the first game and got second overall... talk about shocking! The people were kind when I couldn't understand something or had trouble ordering water.

I haven't had any homesickness except wishing I could hug my friends occasionally or understand what is going on around me. However, I think the fact that I've accepted that I can't understand what's going on around me has actually made it easier to understand and try. My heart still hurts from the separation of my friends and family, but I also recognize that I belong here for now. Honestly, I think I'm ignoring some of the homesickness and the longing to be around those that I love. I find hope in the fact that I haven't cried yet! Psalms 78 was very helpful to me today.

As we've gotten out of the house more and I've been able to see more of Liege, I've found myself falling in love with my surroundings. Everything is green, the houses remind me of a dream village (like you would think of from Germany with the skirts and clogs and such), and the people that act and talk different. The style here is so unique. Everyone dresses nice and in those flowy shirts like we have, they ALWAYS wear jeans and Converse, and blazers are common in every situation.

Franca cooks all the time and has made speghetti, panini's, and meatloaf (which was to die for). The choclate is... well... TO DIE FOR! I thought we had good Dove chocolate back in The States.. HAH! It doesn't even compare. And I must admit, the waffles are fantastic and the coffee is heavenly.

More to come. tout-a-l'heure!

Day 1

I stepped off my plane with a girl that had been an exchange student to Michigan and she helped explain and talk me through some of the issues I would have finding my family. When I walked through the gates I saw, not only my awesome host family, but Pauline! My heart was overjoyed at the realization that she had come to pick me up and brought a cowboy hat with her. :)

As most of you know, Belgium is famous for there waffles. I got the pleasure of having one immediately after I stepped off the plane with my host family and Pauline (the girl who sparked the whole idea of becoming an exchange student). While communicating was hard, if not nearly impossible at first, my family was gracious with my mistakes and helpful in guiding me around. The drive from Brussels to Liege was one of the longest drives of my life because I was so exhausted and overwhelmed by jet lag (it was 3am Texas time, 10am Belgium time) that I was having to force my eyes to stay open. I wanted to see the rolling green hills, the small cars, the Belgian people driving past us, the planes taking off, the animals on the side of the road, but I'm not gonna lie and say I didn't fall asleep... it was only for a minute though, so surely that's ok... right?

On the way home, we stopped to see my host mom at her salon (she's a hairdresser), and I imediately felt at home with her. We left the salon and arrived at home which is a tall, brown, two story building that has purple and grey everywhere. I brought my stuff up to my room, which has pink everywhere, and felt relieved and overwhelmed at the fact that I'd made it this far. My dad called me down to ask about lunch and I was relieved when he brought frites (fries) and a long chicken strip. There was sweet tea and meetballs too. :) After lunch, Vincent had turned the TV on so I sat down to watch it with them and the next thing I know I'd slept for 2 hours.

My family informed me that we were going to a birthday party at 8... I was slightly worried because I hadn't gotten much sleep and I was worried that I wouldn't be able to fit in or emmerse myself in the culture because of my exhaustion, but I stuck it out. I'd like to say that I would've stuck it out reguardless of wether I had to or not, but I'm not sure that I could. As we prepared for the party, I unpacked and did my hair. Shocker, right!? Livia pulled out a curler that was the best invention ever. You put a little piece of hair in it and clamp it shut and it pulls the hair through in a circle and beeps when it's ready! Why don't we have these in America!?!

We left the house at 19:30 (7:30pm) and went to Franca, my host moms, sisters house. Her sisters husbands name was Marc and I shook his hand, because that's normal in Texas, and they all laughed. :) It's so cool getting to see and share the differences in a culture.... We left their house for the party and ended up eating dinner at 22:00 (10:00pm) and stayed until 1:15... needless to say I was exhausted and could barely keep my eyes open but I wouldn't trade that experience for anything... I got to see and participate in Belgian dances, eat the best cake I've EVER had, and meet some incredible people. Overall, I'd say it was a very successful day. God is doing something BIG here, and I can't wait to play a small role in that....

Prayers for the language barrier would be greatly appreciated! Tout-a-l'heure

This Is It - Belgium Here I Come!

After five years of preparation, the day has finally arrived where I fulfilled my dreams of being an exchange student. I expected to be exhausted, run thin, and filled with utter joy. However, I did not expect it to be so hard to leave my friends and family. As I sat at Gate 3, everyone around me looked at me like I was crazy as I sat there with tears streaming down my face. My heart was torn in two as I looked at all that mattered now, and my dreams and future ahead of me. How could I choose? How could I leave? How could it hurt this much when it’s all I’ve ever wanted to do? Because this is what Christ has called me to do. Because He is pushing me out of my comfort zone and calling me out upon the waters. This is preparing me for something I am not yet aware of. So I trust Him.

As I have grown up, I always set my mind on leaving Lubbock. On getting out of my comfort zone. On experiencing life to its fullest extent. But what I never realized was how hard it would be to leave someplace where so many things were good. So, as I began to prepare for my departure over the last month, I was overwhelmed at how hard it was to say “see you later” to all the people that I loved more than life. I began asking God, “Why did You call me to this? Why are You taking me away from something so good?” After asking that question multiple times, He said, “Because I have something great planned.” So I, in all my faithlessness said, “are you sure, Daddy? Are you sure you know what’s best for me?” God taught me something remarkable this month. He taught me that all my fears were for nothing. That His plan would prevail and He is all I need. He is all I need. He is all I need. This life is so temporary… but whether I’m in Guadeloupe, Arkansas, New York, Seattle, Belgium, or anywhere else, He goes before me. He stands beside me. And He follows me. Every step of the way.

The past two years of my life have been focused on loving people to the best of my ability but not necessarily allowing them to love me back… I have always been afraid of letting people close enough to where they could hurt me and have any amount of say in what I do. I’ve always been independent in that aspect. But this month… Christ tore that chain off. I realized that it is okay to allow people to love me back and to let them in past what most people see. It’s okay to show raw emotion to everyone. To let everyone know that they really do matter. And that even the simplest smile or hug made a difference. He says that in this world we will have pain but to take heart because He has overcome the world. Every fear. Every heartbreak. Every let down. He has made it new.

I’m writing this 30,000 feet in the air but my heart is still home. Through the pain of saying goodbye, Christ whispers, “I know you care. I know it hurts. I am all you need. I am your rock. Trust me.” Over and over to my heart…. The people that have touched my heart and molded me into the person that I am are unaware of the brutal awakening of how much you love people when you leave them. Everything meets up eventually, and my emotions came around full circle. The notes, care packages, and little momentous make my heart happy beyond belief and makes me feel like I’m taking a little, physical, piece of them with me. But then I realize that they are with me everywhere I go, because they have taught me things and helped me grow. Because you can’t leave unchanged after realizing that you’re so loved. Because it’s impossible to forget what Christ taught me through them.

This is it. This is the time to be BOLD. This is the time to love radically and fearlessly. And this is the time to be pushed out of my comfort zone into Christ’s arms. So as my plane begins its descent, and this journey is about to begin, I want to say “merci” to everyone who has and ever will crossed my path. Whether in a class, church, or in passing. You’ve shaped me into who I am today. You’ve shown me love, grace, mercy, joy, hope, adventures, and filled me with memories to last a lifetime.

Merci

The Beginning of a New Chapter

Ever since I was a little girl, my dad has called my pictures and memorabilia "kapers".

As I started asking my friends and family what I should call my blog for this upcoming adventure, my dad mentioned, "Kaitlyn's Kapers." How perfect, my dad began documenting my adventures in life; now it's my turn to continue the tradition! 

Throughout the next year, I will 

-Be immersed in a culture that I have never been to

-Become fluent in French

-Meet people from all around the world

-Go through school in a different country

so, the point of this blog is to keep my friends, family, and anyone else interested informed about my experience. I will be telling all sorts of stories about my adventure, and I promise to be completely transparent. I never have, and never will, claim that I know what I'm doing in this world... but by the grace of God, I will be able to spread His love in new places.

So, as my readers I have a request: prayer.

As my departure date draws near, I have become more reliant on prayer. I realize that I am at a disadvantage because I know very little of the language, the culture, and the people. So, my beautiful prayer warriors, here are a few of my prayer requests:

-I would learn the language with speed that could only come from God

-I would be able to immerse myself fully in the culture

-I would build lifelong relationships with everyone I come into contact with

-I would glorify Christ with my attitude and my actions

-That I would make a lasting impact for God, no matter where I am.

So, ready or not, here we go! I cannot wait for you to experience this incredible adventure with me.